It’s minus twenty, so cold that if you close your eyes your eyelids freeze together. Icicles the length of a man hang from trees. The sky is as white as the snow caked ground. In the distance, through the fir forest, you spy a small hole in a blue frozen lake. Waddling towards it, wearing only a fire coloured thong and flip flops, is a tubby blond giant with a beard. You watch in horror as the man slides into the water.

The thought of submerging myself in the freezing blue causes me to shiver from head to toe. Can 120 000 ice swimmers be wrong? Yes they can!

Stark braving mad

If, like me, you are with a Finn, you might grab their arm and tell them to phone emergency services because some nutter is trying to commit suicide. And if you’re as unfortunate as me, you’ll doubtless find yourself the butt of jokes about this panicky reaction for months, maybe even years to come.

Drill, baby, drill

To the uninitiated, even the thought of swimming in a frozen lake sends shivers from head to toe. But to its aficionados in the far north, it’s a fantastic way to stay healthy. Finland is home to 120 000 of these champions. ‘Avantouinti’, literally ‘ice hole swimming’ is popular amongst all ages and both sexes. In a country with more than 200 000 lakes, it’s no surprise that there are 170 official ice holes. And if you can’t find an official one, you simply drill your own.

The iceman cometh

If you stay in Finland too long, you might begin to believe that, because everyone seems to have done it, it’s normal. Indeed, you might even feel that you’re less of a man if you don’t get your kit off and throw yourself into the icy depths. “It’s warmer in the water,” Finns will say. Or “It’s not as cold as it looks.” Or “You have to give it a go.”

Don’t be a cool fool

No. No. No. Just because 120 000 people regularly do it, it does not make it right. Ice swimming may improve body circulation and mood. It may increase resistance to cold related illnesses and relieve symptoms of arthritis. It may make you a real man, but that doesn’t make it right.

Once is never enough

I have jumped out of a 4km high plane. I have cave dived and rolled naked in the snow, but I have my limits. If you, however, succumb to friendly Finnish peer pressure, remember to make sure you go to an ice hole near a sauna. And remember, for ice swimming to work its chilly magic, you have to go regularly. Once, your Finnish friend will tell you while grinning at your chattering teeth, is never enough.