You’ve just met a girl and you want to take her away for a romantic break. Paris is the obvious answer. You check out all the sights; the Eiffel tower, the Louvre, the Montmartre. You cruise down the Seine on a canal boat. Everything is going fantastically. You’re on fire. Then, on the final evening, you want to dazzle her and take her to a restaurant she’ll remember forever. You choose Le Train Bleu, convinced it’ll be just the ticket.

Lucky stars

And there’s no doubt it’s a great option. Located in The Gare de Lyon, which was erected as part of the building program for the Paris exhibition of 1900, the restaurant was opened in 1901. Originally called the Buffett, it took its current name from the luxury train that transported wealthy Parisians to the French Riviera. Regulars have included stars such as Jean Cocteau, Salvador Dali, Coco Chanel and the actor Jean Gabin. The dining room itself was immortalized on screen, when it served as a backdrop in the 1972 movie Travels with My Aunt.

You consider yourself a man of the world, but when you walk through the door, you’re speechless. Never have you seen such an outrageously ornate eatery.

All that glitters is gold

Although you consider yourself a man of the world, when you walk through the door, you are speechless. Never have you seen such an outrageously ornate eatery.

The gold, the murals, the sparkle, the long, leather-upholstered banquettes on a waxed parquet floor and the light of crystal chandeliers reflecting off shiny brass fittings are overwhelming. Your new girl squeezes your hand.

“This is amazing,” she says and you feel better. Then the waiter arrives.

All aboard for grandiose dinning

He looks down his long nose at you, sniffs and leads you to your table. You wonder if he can smell your nerves or if he is just used to foreigners being intimidated by this incredible place. Or perhaps he is simply being French.

The menu is as bourgeois as you’d expect. The starter menu lists oysters, foie gras, escargots and a warm Lyon sausage with potatoes in shallot vinaigrette. Meat dishes include beef steak tartare, prepared at the table; duck breast in honey and spices; leg of lamb, sliced and carved in the dining room.

The girl looks at you and smiles. “Very fancy,” she says.

Your beef fillet with Béarnaise sauce, sautéed potatoes and green beans in butter is delicious. Your companion says the salmon is wonderful and offers to give you a piece to taste. You say yes, then see the waiter staring at you and change your mind.

One trip is enough

You don’t take dessert. Not because Le Train Bleu is pricey (the fixed-price menu runs about 50 euro per person, while an a la carte meal costs about 70 per person), but because you want to get out. You want to go somewhere less golden, less fancy and with no French waiters.

Once outside, the girl hugs you and tells you how wonderful it was. You nod in agreement, telling her how much you enjoyed it, too, but inside you know that you one trip on the Le Train Bleu is enough. The decor was unforgettable, but you prefer your steak served with a smile.